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The Master Of The Shiny Circular Things That Shine Quite A Lot Indeed

One of the great things about The'Rings is the epic text and scale of Tolkien's work. It can transform what would be a mundane description into a wonderful use of imagination.

This quest requires the company to Lord of the rings -ify [ahem...] a normal phrase, event or action in the most melodramatic manner possible, in keeping with the more outandish moments of prose from Middle-Earth. (doncha'just love'em)

Example:

"I am going out to walk the dog"

Could be something like:

"So now, my fellow travellers, I must depart. The fair wind has often carried news of scratching, and howling, and the faint echo of a barking whisper. There are beasts in this world who need to run wild and free, wheresoever they might have been stationed.
Come Fido! Now is the time where a leash must be encumbered for the safety of all that is good! But fear not my little friend, when we reach the moorlands of the Pub-lik' Par'u'k you will run free amongst the rushing grasses along the reeded river shores"

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The TMOTSCTTSQALI Appendix i:
The acronym can be pronounced thus:

TumMOTS-sCuTTS-QuaaLIee (i=ee as in Jet Li )

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"Whats for dinner?"

"Seeing how my stomach is rumbling a bit, may we proceed on through the doorway that is likened unto the one we just passed through and seat ourselves about a table made of rich wood and tender affection? There we shall gather fork and spoon into hand and await the revelation of the delicious aroma that bellows on through the air only foot paces away beyond the warm fire's glow."

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"You dropped your wallet"

"If you may excuse me fine sir, although i know not whether you be fine. But perchance i viewed this leather and cloth carrier of personal items fall from your personage and hit the road, that goes ever on, and believed that perhaps you may be sorrowful and disheartened to find that it had gone astray in a later time and place. I am giving it to you, for having seen it fall, I know it belongs to you. You must take it, and bear it for it is yours to bear. So take your carrier of personal items and be off, I must now bid you farewell on your journey, be safe and let the road take you to where you are going."
 

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As a spin off of Toroto...

I am going to be walked by my person

Exuse me, kind, big person. You are feeling kind, aren't you? I would like to venture to the great wide expance outside this cage. There we could use our legs at a rapid pace as we follow small creatures that choose to place themselves neer the ground.

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I am so tired, been up all night but now:
I have just finished my essay!

or :

The language of this middle earth has not been swift; for much planning and scheming was in force as the words tore the sky asunder; And across the plains I sought to slumber but yet was halted by my weighted burden of many years. Far and wide I scribed my assignations to the point of screaming, and even now though I do not dither or dawdle or waste time for fear of lack of haste which must not hinder my journey STILL the words were lacking the required number that was demanded, long ago from the firey caverns of yore. But then, hark! A sound! A light! and the new spring arose bringing blossoms and sweet air of morning dew; the quest for written ardour was nearing its conclusion and finally I could sleep.

Zzzzzzz.


 

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Hello, how do you do?

Alright let's see if I can do this.

"Greetings to you fellow traveler. How are you faring this fine morning as the sun reachs over the peaks of the glorious, awesome Misty Mountains?"

How was that? My brain is kinda fried at the moment.

 

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Excuse me, do you have the time?

Oh, what precious seconds do soar past by flight of shadow; as dawns and sunsets do rise and fail; to where and from where we know not. Yet we search, onward toward the answers to the riddles which we seek, to what age of man, or elf, or dwarf, do the steady sands of the century belong in this, our erstwhile enquiry for current recognition. And to where do these puzzles lead us? To what land do the sweeping hands of temporal absolution can we set course, have minutes, seconds [ I'm thinking years~Tor~ ] passed since the quest began?

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Drat, I forgot to return the video

"Alas. For the fleeting memory of my past journey, the long road to and fro and fro and to, over the windy hills and under the darkened bridges, through floodlit streets and past the barren wastelands enveloped in their nightly gloom, until at last returning weary but triumphant from the video shop to enjoy the fruits of my labours, it had briefly forsaken me and treacherously fled my overcrowded mind. Ai! Ai! Flame of Udun! I forgot to take the video back!"

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The unleashing of Harry Potter and the Order of the Pheonix.

In the year of our lord,
2000 and 3,
a bookstore will wait,
and so will be Bee.

3 years have we waited,
With 5 months more to go,
It seems small comparison,
At least know we know!

'Oh Potter you rotter',
I'll hum for a year,
The thought that our beloved book,
Soon will be here!

So I'll start a new count down,
Re-read them in haste,
with many more hours,
There's no time to waste!

And that lovely revealing,
The words "time to tell you",
will ring in my ears,
'Till the clock chimes 'it's time to...'

Put on your scarves,
be sure not to miss it,
'cause we've waited and waited,
I think I will kiss it!

Alright. So this really isn't what this topic was made for. But I still like my poem

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"Darn it, i have to do a sleep shift"

Alas, alack, forth to the place of my employment i must go though it is nigh the hour of resting. Sleep, sleep it shall escape me....but sleep i must.....tossing and turning.....early I rose and my day of work i did, but now i must return....and though i must i know i will not sleep.....in a strange bed, listening to the breathing of those in my care, sleep shall not come to me. so i will lie awake and think of the day to come, and as the sun rises in the east, i shall tear myself from whence i lie and perform my duties before i wearily return home, where i will finally lie my head and rest in peace.

*sigh*

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