shenreed
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501-08 New Years Resolutions
Hi everyone,
Well it’s that time again, another cycle, or re-cycle of New Years resolutions. I’d often wondered why all my resolutions either end up in failure, or were simply a form change, with one habit being replaced by another? I’d been lead to believe that my resolutions were simply lifestyle changes that could easily be achieved with the “proper” mental attitude, determination and/or affirmations. Sounded good on the surface, but, if it was that simple and the truth, then why didn’t it work for me? Of course I’d always have some excuse or justification, and the one I used the most was “I’m only human”, as if being human was the cause for my failure. The fundamental flaw in my thinking was the belief that if my mind could control my inner feelings, emotions and body, then I could bring about the desired results in my outside world. The keyword here is control, (unloving intent). The reason this approach didn’t work was because the opposite was actually true; I needed to release my control. In the course of my healing journey I’ve discovered that what I was deliberately or ignorantly told, and naively believed were flaws in my character and personality (my feelings and emotions) that I had to deny or control, were in actually, my strength and power. My feelings, emotions and physical body, needed to be accepted and loved, not denied, controlled and pushed away. To empower myself, to raise my awareness and consciousness, to change, I also needed to be open and willing to challenge everything I believed to be true, especially about love, life, emotions and feelings. My old habits and issues began to collapse once I stopped feeding them my denial energy, as that was all that was supporting them.
The list of resolutions is endless and it doesn’t really matter what it is; the unseen role of denial is present whether we’re trying to quit or start. Take smoking as an example. I believe that smoking is literally putting up a smoke screen, a form of distraction, a diversion to get the focus off of what we’re feeling which might be pressure, panic, confusion, sad, alone, empty, etc. The list goes on and on as there are as many reasons that people smoke as there are people that smoke. Most will say it’s just a habit or that they’re addicted to nicotine and then quote some medical rhetoric they’ve either heard or read. And while there’s a “part truth” in the statement that nicotine is addictive for some people, nicotine is NOT the cause, or the reason that people started to smoke in the first place. When we find and heal the “cause”, the original denied emotions and the mental reasons we started to smoke, we will not only be able to quit, but also find that we no longer have a reason or desire to smoke. And, the beautiful bonus will be that we’ve also healed the part of us that we’ve been hiding and denying behind this smoke screen.
For a level of healing and balance to take place, I needed to feel my denied emotions, release the mental beliefs that were denying my emotions expression and also address the dis-ease held in my body as the result. And yes, I know it’s possible to mentally re-program myself without feeling my denied emotions, but this unbalanced approach not only succeeded in further denying my emotions, but also limited my mental awareness in the process. Out of sight out of mind, didn’t heal my problems, just denied them. Self-empowerment however, meant that I had to take responsibility for all of my being and not just deny or cut off the parts I didn’t like. I can’t heal a cut on my arm unless I first accept that my Body is wounded and needs attention. I wouldn’t think of cutting off my arm just because it was wounded; I now feel the same way about my Emotions and my Mind because they’re also a part of me, otherwise I wouldn’t have them.
Awareness of denial is a key to self-empowerment, as we need to become aware of what we’re not noticing in order to accept and heal those parts of us that we’re denying. The next time your resolution habit or issue “kicks in,” try to become aware not only of your thoughts but also your emotions, feelings and your body’s feelings. There’s a lot more to “non-denial” healing and self-empowerment but this will give you some food for thought.
Love, light and life,
John Rieger
"Healing begins in the Heart"
If you're confused as to why there are two versions of basically the same article you can go to my journey journal(post: 2005 Jan 13) to see the reason for the changes. The following is my orginal post that I later "personalized" to the one above. I'm not going to show the bold and underlined words as I have to do each word seperately and takes too long.
New Years Resolutions:
Well it's that time again, another cycle, or re-cycle of New Years resolutions. Have you ever wondered why all resolutions either end up in failure, or are simply a form change, with one habit being replaced by another? We've been lead to believe that our resolutions are simply lifestyle changes that can easily be achieved with the “proper” mental attitude, determination and/or affirmations. Sounds good on the surface, but, if it's that simple and the truth, then why don't they work? But of course there's always some excuse or justification, and the most abused one is “we're only human”, as if being human is the cause for our failure. The fundamental flaw in our thinking is the belief that if our mind can control our inner feelings, emotions and our body, then we can bring about the desired results in our outside world. The keyword here is control, (unloving intent). The reason this approach hasn't worked is because the opposite is actually true; we need to release control. Our feelings, emotions and physical body, need to be accepted and loved, not denied, controlled and pushed away. To empower ourselves, to change and raise our inner consciousness, we also need to be open and willing to challenge everything we believe to be true, especially about love, life, emotions and feelings. The old habits will collapse on their own once we stop feeding them unloving denial energy as that is all that is keeping them going.
The list of resolutions is endless and it doesn't really matter what it is; the unseen role of denial is present whether one is trying to quit or start. Let's take smoking as an example. Smoking is literally putting up a smoke screen, a form of distraction, a diversion to get the focus off of what you're feeling which might be pressure, panic, confusion, sad, alone, empty, etc. The list goes on and on as there are as many reasons that people smoke as there are people that smoke. Most will say it's just a habit or that they're addicted to nicotine and then quote some medical rhetoric they've either heard or read. And while there's a “part truth” in their comment that nicotine is addictive for some people, nicotine is NOT the cause, or the reason they started to smoke in the first place. Find and heal the “cause”, the original denied emotions and the mental reasons you started to smoke, and you will not only be able to quit, but also find that you no longer have a reason or desire to smoke. And, the beautiful bonus will be that you've also healed the part of you that you've been hiding and denying behind this smoke screen.
For true healing and balance to take place, you need to feel the denied emotions, release the mental imprints, programs and beliefs that are denying your emotions expression and also address the dis-ease held in the physical body as the result. And yes, it's possible to mentally re-program yourself without feeling the denied emotions, but this unbalanced approach not only succeeds in further denying your emotions, but also limits your mental awareness in the process. Out of sight out of mind, doesn't solve the problem, it simply denies it. Self-empowerment means that you have to take responsibility for all of your being and not just deny or cut off the parts you don't like. You can't heal a cut unless you first accept that your Body is wounded and needs attention. You wouldn't think of cutting off your right arm because it was wounded. The same is true for your Emotions and your Mind because they are also a part of you; otherwise you wouldn't have them. Right?
The next time your resolution habit or issue “kicks in,” try to become aware not only of your thoughts but also your emotions, feelings and your body's feelings. Awareness of denial is a key to self-empowerment, as you need to become aware of what you've not been noticing in order to accept and heal those parts of you that you've been denying. There's a lot more to “non-denial” healing and self-empowerment but this will give you some food for thought.
John Rieger
Last edited by shenreed, 18/May/2005, 1:55 am
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